And THEN

I haven’t been watching the hearings. I’ve been catching up afterward. It feels to me as if two nations are attempting to exist simultaneously. One of them is all Pride and Juneteenth and the other? Back in 2020, when I heard Trump’s phone call to Raffensperger, I was appalled. Now I know there was more to it than just that phone call (which was enough!) there was a whole parallel universe going on, ready to go down. Everything hung on the integrity of — it seems — a handful of people. Undermined confidence in the election process seems to be the net result of this whole shit show. New Mexico recently had to have its courts step in to insist that the election be certified. “While two of the three panel members finally agreed to certify the results after pressure the state courts demanded they do so, one continued to refuse, citing “his gut feeling” that the results were wrong. That man was at the January 6th attack on the Capitol.” (Heather Cox Richardson)

It’s very discouraging. It makes me yearn for the half-light world of ignorance. That damned tree of knowledge. “Now you’ve done it,” says God, shaking his head, “You’re going to have to live in reality from here on out.”

Featured photo: Masaccio’s depiction of Adam and Eve’s expulsion from the Garden of Eden before and after restoration. It kind of cracks me up that some artist felt (under pressure from???) they had to paint leaves over Adam and Eve’s privates considering that it was their nakedness to each other that was half the problem in the story. But then, God gave them clothes that were more functional than leaves. “Unto Adam also and to his wife did the LORD God make coats of skins, and clothed them.”

23 thoughts on “And THEN

  1. Trump wasn’t the worst thing to come out of the situation, it was realizing that half of the people you are surrounded by every day are half-witted, tyrannical apes. I mean, I knew people sucked but not THIS BAD.

    • Exactly.

      And those half-witted, tyrannical apes are very loud and public about it. My fall from innocence happened when a parade of huge pick ups carrying Trump, American and Confederate flags went past my house in 2020, some blasting the national anthem. This horror was relieved ONLY by a 1980s Oldsmobile turned low-rider in the middle of this nightmare, windows down, blasting, “Fuck Donald Trump” Great song.

  2. I have been downloading and watching in fits and spurts… It is too depressing. I’m not sure that the volume of the MAGA group is directly correlated to the numbers in their group… The latest campaign to got “RINO” hunting has me thinking there is a complete breakdown of society!

  3. Yesterday’s hearing was the ‘best’ yet (for lack of a better word). When you have grown men about to cry over messages sent to their kids and wives, and poll workers lives changed forever–by a piece of sh*t who doesn’t even care what he says or does…it is sickening. I’ll be glued to the TV again tomorrow, though. I know I’ve said it before, but this is such a train wreck…

    • It’s just so strange. I worked in my front yard today because it’s cool outside. I talked to neighbors. I really hate the way my perception of my world has had to change because of all this. I’m trying to hold onto the belief that if people are nice to me and each other their politics isn’t a problem but it actually is a problem. The racism underlying all the stuff we’re learning is very disturbing — the disillusionment and disappointment I feel in my “fellow” citizens? I really hoped we’d be over it by now. I hoped by the time I was old, we’d be better people to each other. It’s so sad.

  4. I’m right there with you. I really fear for our future. I have read to much history to Europe after WWI not to see disturbing similarities to what is happening here now.

  5. I currently believe, that a good portion of the chaos, discontent and rise of violent forces is due in part, to your observations in your post “Tuesday Thoughts”, regarding abundance.

    My son finally found a studio apartment he can afford, in Colorado Springs, close to his work ‘where he has worked for 4 years) It is in the ‘hood/bad’ part of town, but when I visit him? All I observe are his neighbors, who say hi, hold the door for you, are courteous when you pause to admire their pet they are taking ‘out for dooties’ – etc.

    A look at the cars parked outside, the diversity in gender, race, age of those who live there, tells what all they have in common – “this is where we can afford to live” and to me? They have created a community of kindness in the middle of chaos and I feel safer and happier there than I do if I end up hitting the stores I need something from, in the more ‘affluent’ areas of town – rudeness and entitlement reign – customer service plummets, etc.

    And it reminds me of a line from a book that explored the chaos that ensues when there are observable ‘huge gaps’ between classes, or, for lack of a better term, ‘the haves/the have nots’

    Historically, if everyone is sorta eking by, or doing okay, or slowly bettering their lot in life and pretty much everyone around them, observable to them, in their everyday life, are in the same boat – kindness, courtesy, etc., rather reign.

    America was built on the marketing of “If you’re willing to work, you can make your fortunes here” to attract menial laborers to the new world” and in the wake of each leap in technology, we see the wide gaps show up –

    24/7 news, editorials and opinion, social media where anyone can share their thoughts, their woes, or tell a pack of lies (look at how much I have! In my perfect life! For just 49.99 I’ll tell you how to be like me, too!) 😀

    Well, all that combined? Creates the same gaps – In addition to the conditions waxing and waning in various areas in Europe/here during the span of the Great War/WWII, I ALSO think about the Russian Revolution, the French Revolution.

    Sorry for the long rambling post, but nice to read this, and the comments – for, while so many of us gaze on and think, “But…but…how could this happen? And how could so many forget what this path leads to?” – I truly believe the first step is in knowing, ‘you walk this path not alone’

    I, personally, believe that about 5% of the far left and 5% of the far right, have the bullhorn right now and make it seem louder as if it is the majority – kudos to all of you (blogger an commentors) who refuse to be a part of the ‘silent majority’ – For by speaking up, it lets those who are scared to, know where it is safe to do so –

    • I’m not even sure where the “bad” part of Colorado Springs is. I was surprised to see how things are around the Citadel. When I lived in the Springs, the “bad” neighborhood was west of the tracks across from the Antlers. Also the “Eye-talian” part of town was considered questionable (southeast of Meininger’s). We lived across Academy from Palmer Park (the Bluffs in my lexicon) an area that was undeveloped. Village 7 was a dream in some developer’s eye. It was paradise, but every Springs old-timer sings the same song. I go up there occasionally but I hate the drive and the city seems confused about itself.

      I lived in one of San Diego’s poorest and worst neighborhoods for 17 years. We were a small town in our way and we did look out for each other. I had friends who lived in fancy sections who were afraid to leave their car in front of my house. Finally I said, “OK, so maybe the criminal element is here, but they’re not breaking into the cars here. They’re going to YOUR neighborhood to do it.” I have millions of stories about life there most of which are scary/inspiring. I was happy there and most of the time I lived there alone (with dogs). I don’t have any bad memories of that time.

      The San Luis Valley is also poor and troubled. As long as I don’t know anyone’s politics I get along with everyone I meet. We do look out for each other, but as the last few years have revealed the underlying philosophy and passion for ignorance, my sense of things is a little different. It’s that fall from innocence thing. I didn’t need to know what I now know. OH well… At this point I figure if a person is a good neighbor in the day-to-day that’s all that matters (in the day-to-day). I agree it’s the extreme elements but they have the power to whip up the others, especially those who feel disenfranchised. One of my neighbors called me
      “privileged” because I have a Master’s degree. Well? That degree was incredibly expensive and not in money. It just made me think that we can’t judge others — though we do. We need to remain a little humble and not confuse our assumptions for reality. Easier said than done. ❤️

      • Colorado Springs has, to my experience, always been sorta ‘funny’ on how the ‘hood’ portions of town play out – sometimes? throughout my experience of shopping there, then living and working there over many years, there are ‘good’ areas, with one lil ‘one -two blocks’ of ‘bad’ tucked in the middle! LOL

        A military town (with many bases and the Air Force Academy, to boot!) drives much of this – while being the gate way to ‘God’s Country” and Garden of the Gods and travel point to fly into/tourism, means, really, housing prices were always higher than, say Denver or Pueblo, wages were always ‘lower’ than Denver or Pueblo, too – for many reasons, which I can expound upon….and yet – I lived in a Duplex with a roommate unknown to me, prior to answering ad in paper’ in a ‘hood’ portion, when I was a young, single mother. I also lived in an apartment complex close to work, that gunfire and sirens were a 24/7 occurrence, and if a very wasted male, still pining over his old girlfriend, (who used to live in the apartment I lived in, then) was trying to get in, and trying the windows and despite living 3 blocks from the local PD, it took them nearly 40 minutes to show up – LOL – I never was afraid of my neighbors – I didn’t know all of them, true, but, I usually tried to call out a greeting or say hi, as folks were watching the moving truck and me carrying things in –

        I laughed when I read about your experience of your time in San Diego’s neighborhood, and what your friends worried about – sigh – One thing I think I’ve learned is, there is one thing, we all share in common, “Um…this is OUR neighborhood/community” and well – especially in poorer ones? Folks rather look out for each other, cuz they know the rest of the world outstide of them is stacked against them – but I may be putting rose colored glasses on that – because I remember living in a town where, at the time, there were many societal ills against Hispanics & those of Mexican heritage. there? I encountered challenges and frowns, hate, simply because of the color of my hair/skin – but from ‘others’ not those I worked with, lived near by, etc.

        My experiences in living in various places, living where I could afford, while working minimum wage jobs (or 3.. LOL) or in menial labor/front line service positions, just, I guess, could be summed up as follows:

        “The grass is greenest where it’s watered. So if you cross the fence, be sure to take water with you.” – Robert Fulghum –

        And, in our complex society that goes to the store, rather than buying from their neighbor, who depends upon public services to put out fires, etc., , corporations & insurance companies to provide what used to be provided in times of need/disaster, by one’s neighbors or spiritual community, well – the ‘better off’ some one is? The easier it becomes to scoff and think, ‘why do I need to know my neighbors? They do their thing I do mine and as long as they aren’t making my house value plummet, who cares?”

        For me? I’ve always found small, poorer communities more to my liking, than afluent areas where conformity and ‘material’ values are the #1 goal – so others can wish to live were ‘we’ do AND our home values go up!

        The people and resources and pace of life and sense of community always mattered more to me – 😀

        P.S. – there can, at times, be a barrier to connecting with those who have received higher education – I know – I was unable to afford to attend college, the year I graduated, even though I was valedictorian of my class and thirsted to learn – BUT! I have in my circle, so many have BAs, Masters or PhDs – who hold positions in higher education system land – that do not ‘talk down to me’ or tell me how I’m ‘not seeing it’ from their higher level of more knowledge –

        On the other hand, I’ve worked, often, in frontline/mid-level positions where that kind of haughtiness is displayed, decided and implemented with little to know understanding of the strugggles and or impacts to front line workers – too –

        Me? I’m pretty honest about my lack of certified, here’s the proof, higher education – when offering feedback/possible solution – but if anyone depends upon me to ‘bring solutions/build solutions, for lower pay rate, due to not having a degree, but we trust you have the skills to get it done’ ??

        They better be ready for a debate, and not be an arsewipe, when I question, a portion of their plan, for clarification on a portion of ‘what they want’ that I’m struggling over how that is gonna work, for those who actually must ‘do the work’ in the long term – I KNOW about the work that must be done front line, OR I’ve made it my business to know (it’s called shadowing, tagging along, and just watching the day of work unfold….LOL)

        So, given your last line? I know many who, were able to get their higher degrees at a time when, it was, for them, possible,given work, sacrifice, priorities for them – I do not begrudge them their success, or benefits –

        But, I also remember, my Dad, valedictorian of his class, wanted to be an architecht – he went to college for one semester, and decided he liked to eat. 😀 So he got a job as an apprentice, at an HVAC shop – I still have/use his first assignment (make your own tool box out of sheet metal) It’s about 60 years old – still works!

        He worked through journeyman, then up to master plumber. MOved to Colorado and repeated the steps, through working for someone else, to get his certs in Colorado –

        He educated homeowners why the the architect’s rendering of new home build/remodel/addition wouldn’t past inspection –

        He educated new inspectors on why things were done a certain way, to last and, when in need of repair/maintenance, it would be easier to get to –

        And! He knew how to put in a water source, on new job site, in cold weather, that would freeze/crack, utilizing the laws of thermodynamics – (still wish I could remember how that whole thing worked, that he told me about, when I was 12 or so – )

        So, to me? there are life long learners who sometimes get proof of their learning, or just pick it up along the way as the live, learn and grow, then share with others –

        the only ‘privileged/entitled’ ones I have worked with, run across, in community circles? Are the ones that are worthless, really, to my mind, simply because, they do not value the myriad of human creativity, innovation, community that surrounds them, but only look to other humans re: “What can I get from this person” – 😀

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