Back at Work on this Monday Morning

Yesterday, to combat my dark mood, I started in on the big pile of contest books. I’m glad I did because I found some good ones and one that is stunningly beautiful. I love that. I went through them all yesterday, reconciled the actual books with my lists, set up their critique sheets and actually finished a few of the shorter ones. It kept me off the streets which was good since the wind was howling around the house most of the day.

I also appreciate your encouraging comments yesterday. I guess all we can do is our best under our circumstances. It did get me thinking about “success.” I still don’t know what it is other than it probably isn’t measurable. Two unrelated, pretty random things led to that coil of self-doubt we all hold inside: my 70th birthday coming up and a headline from The NY Times, “How do you know when the world is finished with you?” or something like that. I couldn’t actually read it because of the pay wall but…

In other news, 7 to 10 inches of snow is predicted for my former mountains in Southern California. We’ve gotten a big dump of snow here in the mountains, but nothing here on the valley floor. My pussy-willow is blooming, and even the talk I had with her yesterday had no effect. I think I’m just going to have to abandon hope this winter. Who knows?

22 thoughts on “Back at Work on this Monday Morning

      • Snow in Seattle…now that’s news! We had a little when I woke up. It was heavy and wet, being above freezing. I slept in and the neighbor had already shoveled our sidewalk. I guess we’re now the old folks on the block so the young ‘uns help us out.

        • Ha haha! We old folks are the only people shoveling in my neighborhood. The guy next door has a snow blower but when they’re out of town, I shovel their walk and that ends up to being almost the whole block. Luckily, I enjoy it.

  1. Self doubt always seems to cycle around, I find. I love those long stretches where I’m not questioning everything and just living life to my best. As far as what success is, each person has to define that for themselves. I can’t believe the weather you are having. We just got a foot of snow and now we are in a week of deep freeze, -35c here today. Too cold to walk Ophelia.

    • “Hi Ophelia, Bear here. It’s no good having snow when you can’t go for a walk. I hope things improve soon. Your pal, Bear.”

      I can’t believe our weather, either. I’m at the point almost that if it does snow I’ll just feel betrayed. 😀 I have never been able to define success for myself. I just do stuff. If I attempt to look at it from some external perspective, I just feel bad. So…I’m going to attempt to recapture that equilibrium of just doing stuff and forgetting the external stuff.

  2. Like I normally do, I’m reading your posts out of order. When I’ve gone several days without seeing you I feel withdrawals coming on. I understand ANY dark mood at this point. It’s very cool that you judge books, Martha. All of your gifts just coil around you! 🤍

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