Lamont and Dude Ponder Obviosity

“Ha ha ha ha ha, Oh my god, ha ha ha…”

“Lamont, what’s so funny?”

“Oh Dude, someone on the tube — I mean on the plasma —  just said, ‘It’s as obvious as the nose on your face’. You know, nothing is LESS obvious to the person BEHIND the nose, the person from whose face the nose projects. Of all the people in the world, THAT person alone has no chance of seeing the nose, that is, without a mirror and THEN they’ll see it backwards.”

“I don’t get what’s so funny.”

“It’s a great metaphor. In my innumerable lifetimes, I’ve experienced, time and again, that there’s nothing less obvious than the obvious.”

“Obviously. Remember when I found you, all lovelorn and shit, on that promontory, waiting for a message in a bottle?”

“Dude, you forget. It was I who found YOU.”

“Right on. Well? Whoever it was, it was obviously absurd, right? But it finally arrived.”

“No it didn’t.”

“It didn’t?”

“No, Dude. That was trash.”

“Whoa. Really?”


“But I remember a wine bottle washed up on the beach.”

“Yeah, that did happen, but remember? The cork was all swollen from the salt water. We broke it open, well, I broke it open and the message was some guy’s receipt from Wines’R’Us.”

“Oh well. Long distance love affairs are pretty challenged from the get-go and then when your main squeeze lives in another country and communicates through messages in a bottle, what chance does it have? You wanna’ go get a chorizo burrito? Remembering that made me hungry.”

“Where? Do you want to go to Alibertos, Aibertos, Albertos or Robertos?”

“Doesn’t matter as long as it’s some ‘bertos’ or another.”


Lamont and Dude are characters I came up with a couple of years ago. They have the uncanny ability to remember many of their past lives which gives them a rather different perspective on things. If you enjoyed this, you can read more by typing Lamont or Dude in the search bar.

6 thoughts on “Lamont and Dude Ponder Obviosity

  1. Yes, obvious. Like that thing I was looking for that was sitting exactly where I was looking and I still couldn’t see it. Obviously not as obvious as it obviously seemed.

    • Nope. My friend Lois, when we were in Switzerland, was constantly losing things and they were usually right in front of her. She said that’s a persistent problem. I do OK with inanimate objects, but other aspects of reality, the obvious goes right past me.

  2. The only messages I seem to get are from the tax authorities. I wish they would put them in a bottle, I could then bring the bottle to the bottle bank. If I find anything with your name on it in Switzerland I will send it back to you.

      • I also had my friend who was convinced I was not doing anything when what I was doing was standing quietly to hear train announcements or read the schedule. She also kept running off to ask questions at information (in very loud English so they could understand her). I love her to pieces but I won’t travel with her again.

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